Watch this from where the link starts in the video which is 32:24 to 42:42 then come back to this comment which I’m going to write now.
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As an adoptee this video makes my blood boil, it’s the definition of ignorance about foster care and adoption. He isn’t an adoptee and knows a few adoptees, but says that most adoptees don’t want to know who their birth parents are because they have their adoptive parents, an ignorant generalisation. It’s within an adoptee’s right to decide whether or not they want to know who their birth parents are, and it’s not an either or situation, an adoptee can love their (adoptive) parents and equally want to make contact with their birth parents for any reason they like, it doesn’t mean we love them less or care more about one than the other. For me I want to contact my birth mum to understand more about the early part of my life and heal some wounds, it doesn’t mean I don’t love my mum or think of her as lesser.
He compares having a step dad to people having foster and adoptive parents which isn’t comparable in the slightest and couldn’t be more different. A step parent is an addition into an already established family unit, whereas a person who has foster or adoptive parents has had to be removed from their birth family and have their entire world and family changed. Yeah okay we share one similarity of having a non-biological parent, but couldn’t be for more different reasons.
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These kind of videos really get on my nerves.
You’re doing great things, and I can’t wait to see your videos!
Hopefully they will help change people’s minds on the Ruby storyline.
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Thank you 
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This video has inspired me to do a video “essay” on this subject. I’d title it: Ruby isn’t ungrateful for wanting to find out who her birth parents are - An Adoptee’s POV. It’s clearly needed because there’s a lot of ignorance. I’d point him to watch Long Lost Family: Born Without Trace, the show that Ruby was on. Foundlings have a reason to find out where they came from because they’ve grown up not knowing the basic fundamental facts of their own identity, a person’s identity: parentage, heritage, family + medical history, and the circumstances of birth. Forming a relationship with any biological relatives is up to the foundling and there is nothing wrong with that.
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Honestly same here. Just talking about it in Context of being an entertaining Video that I wanna watch, watching this bit just puts me off really. Poor Taste Points aside, I find it honestly an irritating watch. The constant use of swear words gets exhausting after a while and doesn’t add much to it. I don’t mind a swear word here and there, but I think strong Language like that should be reversed and not overused, especially when trying to come across as proper Criticism that is meant to be taken seriously. Doesn’t help too when there are points made which just come across as arrogant, while also being extremely ignorant.
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It’s the kind of video that is clearly made as engagement bait, designed to be a little outrageous and loud for attention. Irritating.
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When I saw this on YouTube, I instantly knew that he was going to address the adoption aspect, and honestly it was a struggle to watch and could only watch bits of it, so asked a friend who’s also an adoptee if they could watch it with me which helped.
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In his head, the logic is “An adoptee has their family so they don’t need to want to make contact with their birth parents/family” and I’m like, one that’s easy for you to say because you live with your birth family, know where you come from, and aren’t care experienced, but two it’s this idea that it’s one or the other, adoptive or birth family. It can be both, especially as nowadays contact is something that’s attempted, not always possible but if there are biological relatives that an adoptee can have contact with like grandparents, uncles, aunties, immediate cousins, possible siblings, then it’s encouraged, it doesn’t mean that the adoptive family are some how less of the child’s family because they are in contact with members of their birth family. For me, I had no contact with any of my birth family after I’d been adopted, I did have supervised contact when I was in foster care. But my birth dad only came to the first few and stopped going, and my birth mum went to less and less supervised visits as months went by.
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I think Louise’s contribution to Ruby’s life is definitely overlooked. I fully agree that Carla is Ruby’s real mum because she cared for and raised her, but you can’t dismiss and say Louise isn’t her mother too, because while yes it was only for several months, she, a scared 15 year old girl, kept her pregnancy hidden from everyone so her abusive step dad wouldn’t find out and have Ruby raised in the same household as him. Louise then gave birth all alone and to keep her baby safe she was forced to leave her at a Church where she’d be taken in, fostered and adopted, she did this all out of love for her child to keep her safe and give her a good life, she did what a real mum would do.
I think Ruby only being wrapped in a jumper is a writing flaw, she should’ve been wrapped in a thick blanket with a hot water bottle tucked underneath. Plus Louise should’ve knocked on the door before she walked away. Having these two things would’ve shown that Louise wanted to keep Ruby safe.
People may ask why Louise didn’t report her step dad to the Police or have Ruby officially fostered and/or adopted, but the fact that she had to leave Ruby I think speaks for itself that her step dad was the kind of person who could fool you easily with a nice guy act and would be able to convince the Police that he wasn’t doing anything, plus the fact that if he found out, he’d likely try and get custody of Ruby because of Louise being a minor. And it’s not right that fans judge Louise about how she didn’t go looking for Ruby, they forget that it was an extremely traumatic situation for her and as she said to Carla and Cherry, she was scared that Ruby would hate her.
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To add, a lot’s happened for me since I was last properly active on here. My life has really been paralleling Ruby’s journey because I’ve now reconnected with my birth family, on my birth mum’s side I’ve met my Uncle, two Aunties, Nan, and a few Cousins. Also, the location I met my Uncle who was the first person of my birth family I met was really special.
I live in Cardiff, and through the local Adoption Agency I have a Social Worker who’s been helping me with contacting birth family, and came with me to meet him. The Adoption Agency’s office in Barry is just 3 minutes away from Academy Expresso, the cafe that was used in Empire of Death for when Ruby reunited with her birth mother, and so that’s where I chose to meet my Uncle because it was too good of a coincidence not to take advantage of.
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Oh that’s brilliant! I’m so pleased for you. The Doctor Who connection really adds a little something.
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If anyone is interested, I’ve written this “essay” about why the Doctor being an adoptee and foundling fits with the character, plus all of the things revealed in The Timeless Children that do fit with the Doctor’s character.
The Doctor Being An Adoptee Fits - Video Essay.pdf (83.6 KB)
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I would also add to this that the Doctor finding endings and goodbyes extremely painful is another reason that it fits for the Doctor to be an adoptee and foundling, because attachment, separation, and abandonment issues are common difficulties for adoptees.
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I think this would be great to do and I look forward to watching it when you eventually make it!
The biggest issue for me with the Timeless Children, and you basically touched on this, is so far the lack of exploration of the concept. We seem to be in this era of Who where huge lore bombs are being dropped left and right and instead of taking time to explore them, what they mean, how they actually impact the characters they’re just sort of left existing. There was some attempt at it for sure, but it just feels more hollow when the idea exists, but there’s very little action taken after that idea is introduced.
But from an adoptee’s stand point I could imagine the idea of the Doctor being one as well would be an incredible thing to learn. And that IS a good thing.
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I’ll read this today or tomorrow!
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100% percent agree, I wish Flux had really built on the revelations in the finale, keeping the major mysteries revealed a mystery like the Doctor’s origins and how old/how many lives the Doctor has had, but exploring the life of the Fugitive Doctor. I think her role in Jodie’s era should’ve been about answering why the Doctor couldn’t remember their Pre-Hartnell life and what actually led to the mind-wipe. If Series 13 was 10 episodes that could’ve been done.
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With the Doctor being an adopted Gallifreyan, I was thinking of adding a comparison to Leia Organa, because she’s an adopted Alderaanian, and natively from Tatooine and Naboo, but never saw herself as not an Alderaanian. I think that many fans have forgotten or not realised that you don’t have to be from somewhere in order to be a real member of that place or family. The Doctor is a Gallifreyan because that’s the species and culture they were adopted into, and grew up in and as.
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This is genuinely a perfect comparison. Right down to having her planet destroyed by someone else and then later find out she isn’t native to that planet. She’s still very much of that culture, her blood does not define that. I like it.
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Absolutely 
I didn’t thank of that actually, that Alderaan was destroyed. I wonder though, she always knew that she was adopted, but did she know that she wasn’t from Alderaan.
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