07/11/2025 TARDIS goes wrong
“I think the helmic regulator’s on the fritz again.”
“Where are you going to get a replacement from? You can hardly source spare parts while the randomiser prevents us materialising at a predetermined destination.”
“I overrode it when we nipped between Paris and prehistoric Earth. I could do so again.”
“But that was an abject emergency. Besides, navigating without a helmic regulator will be no picnic.”
“I like a good picnic. Remind me to take you to Corfe Castle. That’s an excellent spot to roll out a blanket and have some sandwiches.”
“Do concentrate, Doctor. We need to fix the helmic regulator, remember?”
“Oh, that thing? Maybe a good bang on the top of the console will see it right.”
“If it needs new allifrex crystals, that’s only going to make things worse. K-9, where can we get some replacements?”
“Allifrex crystal deposits are rare in most of the known universe, Mistress, but there is some mining on the planet Golfrundix, found in the inner horsehead nebula. Market conditions make a purchase unaffordable, however.”
“Have we any of the local currency, Doctor?”
“Cheese and pickle make the best sandwiches of course. Although a scotch egg in a picnic is sublime. Have you ever tried a scotch egg, Romana?”
“Doctor, please, we were trying to fix the TARDIS. We’ll not manage to go on any picnics if we don’t!”
“I think the old girl’s far more resilient than you think. She’ll be fine.”
“Stop patting the console and do try to concentrate. We need new allifrex crystals to fix the helmic regulator or we won’t be going anywhere.”
“Why didn’t you say? I think I’ve got a couple of them in my pocket. No idea why I was carrying them about with me. Hold on. Yes! Here, will these do?”
"Yes. I’ll just fit them now. Doctor, have I told you that you can be incredibly infuriating at times?’
“Maybe once or twice. Oh!”
“What is it?”
“I remembered something very important.”
“What is it, Doctor?”
“Pork pies! Romana if you haven’t had them in a picnic, you haven’t lived! Romana, why are you looking at me like that?”
“…eight, nine, ten… and breathe. Oh, it’s nothing, Doctor.”